[ R U S T B O R O, a settlement ]

[Dizzy]

R U S T B O R O •••

Well, kiddies. I hate to sound cliche, but, if you were born here, you're going to fucking die here.

Rustboro, the small family town, the safest most boring place on the face of the planet... Is now back up and running for your... not-becoming-a-zombie-pleasure.

Courtesy of a small group of people, that most of you will remember, our little hole in the wall town is now starting to look... somewhat like it did before the end of the world! We've got many a thing here... A clinic, promise of home security, food, water, electricity, heat for those cold winter months... Yeah, pretty much everything we had before the end of the world...

Alright, I'm lying to you and to myself, but it's okay to have a bit of a delusion every now and again. We're not looking at being anything like what we were before, but... Well, it works for now.

But anyway, this seems to be one of the only places to set up roots. Or, to just stop in and do your daily business. Whatever it is that you're doing.

But, make sure to say "Hello," and "Thank you," to that guy that we know as Boyscout for securing all of our amenities, and utilities, Kyle, for being a medic, Nic for developing our security system and Sammy for making us, in essence, a gated community!

As always, Rustboro citizens and eavesdroppers, this is Nicky Nuclear. Peace, love and bomb shelters.

[ Transmission Ended ]

[THE G O S S I P_ ZOMBIE]

Rumor Has It...

Here's something that faggot, fuck wad, Nicky Nuclear hasn't told you yet...

Hey, hey there.

This is your one, and only gossip girl, Zee le Zombie. I've got something to tell you guys that you wouldn't fucking believe. Ha! Where is Nicky Nuclear now, huh? That's right. The chump is always acting like he's got the best gossip, when he ain't got shit. Keep your nose to the ground, Nicky! Instead of your ear, because apparently, you're already deaf!

But, anyway. Now that I'm done proving that girls can do anything better than boys... Haha, y'feel me, ladies? I've got some news to tell you. Specifically about that spicy red head that we've been hearing so much about! Yeah, Kyle. The girl that runs the New Age Clinic? If you ain't heard of her, you're livin' under a rock.

Word around the streets is that she's managed to find herself something that might help her find a cure for this 'Zombie Plague' that has taken over us. I don't know about you, but I wish her the best of luck. I'm tired of eating shit from a can just so that I don't get infected.

But anyway, my little over-zealous rascals,
I'm peacin' out.

Love,
Zee le Zombie

[THE G O S S I P_ ZOMBIE]

Rumor Has It...

Here's something that faggot, fuck wad, Nicky Nuclear hasn't told you yet...

Baha! Where is your precious Nicky Nuclear, huh? Seems that he's gone MIA.

What's a matter, are you scurred, Mr. Nicky? Or maybe, it's because he's not as good and tell it all as he claims to be. Psh, whatever.

Hey there, ladies and gents, this is your girl Zee le Zombie here to fill you in on all of the latest and greatest shit, as always. *muah*

Well, you know how I told you about that bomb girl, Kyle Brennan, right? Well, it turns out that we've got a bit of a problem on our hands. The "Crusaders" or, as I like to call them, bible-humping-over-zealous-zealots-with-a-crucifix-up-their-ass-Spiritualists, have started to hide the flower that she has found has the ability to help cure us all. And guess who fuckin' placed the order? John Whittaker. Huh. Never took a religious man as the type to be a military minded guy.

But, whatever. The girl seems tough as nails. She'll find some more? Right?

If not, I'm marching my perky little as down there, personally to rip the throat out of that over religious fuck.

Just who the hell does he think he is to put us all in an even worse situation than we were before. Pshh. I'll knock his fuckin' teeth out.

But anyway, my little over-zealous rascals,
Time for me to peace out, maybe take a bubble bath. I promise I'll think of you ;]

Love,
Zee le Zombie