Mila ,, it's gone on too long

[Lucas Karl North]

If someone was going to describe Lucas North they'd probably say he was a leader. He was strong, dependable, sometimes cold but always unyielding. He was strong in more senses then one and he could certainly be a force to be reckoned with. What they wouldn't say was that he was ever really open, or even emotional. And yet...all he was currently feeling was nerves. In fact he was shit scared, not that he'd ever show it on the outside, because he had to apologize. Yes, the fearless Raider leader was scared because he had to say sorry. Call him what you would but, when you knew he was going to attempt to say it to one Mila Eppolito, he'd bet money on getting sympathy and words of encouragement.

Actually, scratch that. Once they knew he'd practically kidnapped her first and dragged her away to red river creek they'd probably be asking if they could have his guns after he was dead. He wouldn't even blame them because he figured this was the place he'd meet his maker too... Unless the gift he'd bought her was enough to make her change her mind. Considering he'd spent four hundred and fifty dollars on her he sure hoped it would. Especially since the only other woman he knew well enough to give a gift like that was Melody and he wasn't going to give them to her if Mila didn't want them. She'd get the wrong idea. So then he'd have to sell them on and Jesus if that wouldn't be awkward as fuck.

Looking over to the woman in question he very nearly cringed at the look of thunder that had crossed her face. Needless to say he couldn't be under any other assumption than she was pissed off with him for bringing her here. Not to mention how he'd done it, even though it had literally been the only way to get her to be there with him. Clearing his throat he chanced another look at her, having momentarily looked towards the creek, and tapped the box that he held in his hand just for something to break the silence.

"I actually have something to say to you," He started, hating how it sounded already. "but I couldn't say it in Rustboro. Or Hamburg. And I didn't fancy saying it in Quaker Meadows because those spiritualists creep me out. So we're here." He paused then, wanting her to at least say something to him before he carried on; just to judge how much she hated him and how carefully he'd have to tread on the egg shells.

Notes: short to start with :3
Outfit: so lazy right now
Words: I didn't count :x

[Mila Mika Eppolito]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style,padding-left:16px; padding-top:0px; padding-right:0px; padding-bottom:0px; background-image:url(http://i462.photobucket.com/albums/qq345/originalscenesta/black_.jpg) ] it's gone on too long It's just the way that we're diseased It's the blade that stains us. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Mila was... beyond pissed. Words could not describe the anger that she felt toward Lucas at the moment. He had shown up to take her away from one of the only people that understood her. He dragged her away from everything, like it was his place to do. Then, he left everything completely silent, until they got to this God forsaken place, and now he wanted to get up, and walk around in the middle of leech territory. Was he out of his fucking mind? Something told her that he was. She could have killed him. But, they both knew what it was that was holding her back from doing it. The reason that Mila had agreed to come back with Lucas was because she felt as though something was going to be different between them. That, he was going to stop being such an asshole. Well, she had just proved to herself that she was capable of being a naive child. When he had gotten her and requested her presence at the River, she glared daggers at him. She didn't want to be around him; she didn't want to feel anything toward him. Leaving with him was a mistake. And to think, she could have still be in Rustboro, or even Hamburg with Mero, starting a new life away from this. Clenching her jaw, she let him speak. Even though the sound of his voice really was doing nothing for her temper right now. So, he had something to say, huh? It was probably something along the lines of scolding her for developing a mind of her own, and defying the laws that he had set forth for her. After all, that was the way that Lucas worked. But this wasn't all that it was about, actually. She knew what was bothering her. But, that wasn't for her to bring up at the time. Lucas kept it a damn well kept secret. There was clearly a reason for that. The two of them had their secrets that they kept from each other. Mila because she knew that Lucas would use it as ammunition against her. Lucas, because he was afraid that she was going to be as cold hearted as him. At least, that's the way that she saw it. Who knows, maybe it was a bit colored by her own spite. In all reality, it probably was just something that Lucas didn't want to relive. Even just to tell. Mila watched him, anger clear on her face. She wanted to rip his head off, but... it was a little known fact that with those that she gave a relative shit about, she was fair. "Spit it out then, before some Old Blood decides that they crave me as a Devotee." she growled. TAGGING, LUCAS THE LOATHED. 464. OUTFIT

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[Lucas Karl North]

"Spit it out then, before some Old Blood decides that they crave me as a Devotee." Lucas really wanted to just roll his eyes at how ridiculous that sounded. Mila wouldn't be faithful enough to be a Devotee. Of course, he stopped dead in that train of thought because he knew it wouldn't end well. Especially if he happened to shove his foot in his mouth again and actually make a comment about it. It wouldn't put it past himself since it was the very same reason he was in the entire mess in the first place. Making a careful effort not to tut, he actually just sighed and ruffled his hair slightly.

"Well, if you're going to be like that." He growled, almost moodily because this was not how this had gone down in his head. "I'msorryIupsetyou." Oh, way to go Lucas. Saying it faster and in an almost incomprehensible manner was cheap and a total cop out. "Things got somewhat out of hand and a lot more..aggressive than they should've. My intention wasn't to piss you off or have you disappear and go gallivanting off with a tool." He knew that him calling her latest penis a tool probably wouldn't go down entirely well but Lucas would flat out refuse to take it back. The guy was a giant penis, especially with the way he tried to be clever and threaten him with a gun. Honestly, it had been his lucky day that Lucas hadn't just taken it off him and smacked him across the face with it. He probably should have just to make him shut up since he apparently loved to talk. Even when nobody was listening or even cared.

"Point is, you made it difficult when I came to get you and bring you back, and that's not really how I wanted it to go." He shrugged then, rubbing a hand over his face. This was actually a lot more difficult then he'd thought it would be. Even with the gift he'd brought along to give her; an object which his eyes trailed down to as he sighed. "I know you laughed when I said we missed you but we did. It wasn't the same without you on your raids and shit." Lucas looked up at her then and shrugged again, being more open than he'd ever been and only because there was nobody else around to see it. This is what she'd wanted, right? "I already told you I wouldn't leave anyone behind and that included you."

Notes: so distracted while writing this haha
Outfit: so lazy right now
Words: I didn't count :x

[Mila Mika Eppolito]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style,padding-left:16px; padding-top:0px; padding-right:0px; padding-bottom:0px; background-image:url(http://i462.photobucket.com/albums/qq345/originalscenesta/black_.jpg) ] it's gone on too long It's just the way that we're diseased It's the blade that stains us. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - She snorted. A five word sentence condensed into one meaningless word. She bit down on the inside of her cheek and looked up at him, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Can you say it a little bit more sincere this time?" she asked, folding her arms across her chest. If he was going to say it, he might as well just say it the right fucking way. "What was your intention then?" she asked, her tone flat, her eyes now cold to him. It was amazing how one never noticed there was warmth there... Until it was gone. "And that tool values me, and my opinion." she said, watching him carefully. "And never has once shoved something in my face that shouldn't have been." She took a deep breath and willed those thoughts to escape her. This was supposed to be something they were doing so they could get along better... So there was no tension. Mila knew the protocol well. This wasn't him apologizing because he truly felt bad. "Look Lucas." she said, through gritted teeth, her face contorting into something more like rejection... sadness as she kept her eyes locked somewhere far away from him. "I don't care what the rest of them think." It was almost as though the words were about to die in her throat; it was like, she couldn't get past the pain that she felt. "I want to hear that you miss me." she took a deep breath and forced herself to lock eyes with him. "But I guess I'm just weak in that way, right? Wanting somethin' that I ain't never gonna have?" She sighed and looked up at him. "Look. We're going to have fights, no matter what. It's just us. But, this ain't gonna affect the way that I treat you on the rig. No one needs to know what happened. I'll keep my nose in my side of shit, and you can keep your nose on your side of shit." "Just do me the favor of not kickin' me when I'm vulnerable." She swallowed and looked down at the ground. "Are we done?" She asked, in a voice that was entirely too soft. TAGGING, LUCAS THE LOATHED. 363. OUTFIT

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[Lucas Karl North]

Bad move. "I'm sorry I upset you, Mila. I didn't have any intention when I said what I did. I was being a dick and... Well, I was just being a dick." He shrugged, hating the way she was looking at him as if she just wanted him to drop down dead. This wasn't exactly easy for him and she should've known that. He never apologized for anything because he was the type of man who didn't give a rat's ass what people thought of him. The fact he was even doing this should've shown that at least her opinion counted for something. Surely that should've held some weight when she was judging him. "I value you! I value the shit you do and they way you always put up me and my bad attitudes. I value you as part of the team and I fucking value you as a person!"

He hadn't meant to snap and he turned away from her, the tension in his shoulders building before he lashed out and took a swing at the closest tree trunk. Fucking stupid... He hated this. Nothing he wanted to say was coming out right and he just felt like he was coming up against this huge wall of resistance from her. What the fuck was he supposed to do to make this right if she wasn't even willing to give him a chance? He was making an effort! That was more than should've been expected from him.

Her voice pulled him from his moment of sulking though and he looked back to her, listening to what he was saying but shaking his head the more he heard. It was bullshit. Looking up at the sky for a moment he steeled himself, preparing for a moment he'd been avoiding since before he could remember. "No. No we're not done." He started, letting his gaze drop back to her just so she could see the point she'd pushed him to. She was the one that wanted this. "I do miss you, Mila. Y'know why I never said it? Why I never actually admitted that it was pretty much me who wanted to bring you back sooner rather than later? Because maybe it makes me a weaker man but I don't like letting people in. I don't like people knowing I can be fucking vulnerable because leaders are the opposite of that. Respect is a shit thing to value more than openness towards other people but that's just the way I am. Maybe because I know that the people I let in turn out to be the first ones who want to stab me in the fucking back." He almost growled, locking his gaze with hers even though all he really wanted to do was turn and walk away again. She was dragging up old memories and crap that he'd had buried for years now. He didn't need to relive it. He didn't need to think about his wi-- No.

"It's not going to work. I can't keep to my shit when I know you're off sleeping around with god knows who. You know, every time I hear that's what you've been up to I want to hunt them down and break up their face so bad you won't look twice at them again? No, of course you don't know that, because you never thought about the way it might effect your team when we hear shit like that about you. I bet you don't even know that I've been in more fights than I care to admit just because someone might've been talking about the shit they want to do to you around me. I've done the same for Melody but fuck if it doesn't piss me off more when it's you." He laughed humorlessly then, turning away again as he rubbed a hand over his face as if to try and collect himself again. He'd never told anyone half of this and yet here he was telling it all to Mila. Maybe now she'd understand that he wasn't just the shallow fucking puddle she liked to think he was. Maybe now she'd understand that he had more feelings than she ever gave him credit for. Wouldn't that be a miracle.

"Y'know... If I didn't value you, or miss you, or even feel so fucking bad about what I said to you, I wouldn't have gone out and bought you fucking jewelry as a fucking 'I'm sorry' gift." At that point he tossed the box in his hand towards her, listening to it hit the floor and actually not giving a fuck anymore. "So you go ahead and think what you want about me, Mila. This is the last time I'm going to prove myself to you." His last sentence came out in a voice that was far too broken than he would've liked to hear but what was said was said now and he could take none of it back. However, if she even thought about repeating it to anyone, he'd be the first to deny it.

Notes: so emotional !
Outfit: so lazy right now
Words: I didn't count :x

[Mila Mika Eppolito]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style,padding-left:16px; padding-top:0px; padding-right:0px; padding-bottom:0px; background-image:url(http://i462.photobucket.com/albums/qq345/originalscenesta/black_.jpg) ] it's gone on too long It's just the way that we're diseased It's the blade that stains us. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - "You were being a dick? That's the only explanation you can offer?" she asked, her brows furrowing as she watched him. "You want me to accept that as an apology when you..." She swallowed and threw her hands up, looking to the side. "I guess you were fucking, right. I shouldn't tell somebody something if I don't want it thrown back in my face. Maybe then, I wouldn't fucking hurt so much." she hissed, her eyes wavering as though fresh tears were about to fall down her face. "But I doubt that you care, Lucas. Because, if there's one thing as a Leader that you still don't understand it's compassion. For fucks sake, even I show compassion. And not just to my friends, but to my fucking submissives." "If you fucking value me, so much," she began, her eyes on his back as he went and took a swing at the tree. "Then you'd know what I don't want to say. And you'd understand why I wanted to confide in you, and why it hurts so much when you treat me like a possession." She hated this vulnerability. She hated the fact that she was now all but naked in front of him, baring every little scar that he had given her on her flesh for him, and the world to see. It scared the shit out of her. More confessions escaped her lips. More uttered words of broken hearts, and her life being in shambles. She felt pathetic; worthless. She felt every way that she promised that she would never allow herself to feel again. Like she was that little girl once more, with a man poised between her legs, uncaring that she would never have a true first kiss, or lose her virginity to a man that she wished to give it too. Her eyes darkened at the thought, and that was when she asked if their conversation was done. "Do you really think that I would stab you in the fucking back?" she seethed, taking a step toward him, anger and rage burned onto her features. She pressed her lips together and shook her head. A part of her craved this reaction from him; it made her feel as though he cared. That he needed her in the way that she needed him. But... This wasn't one of those situations. He didn't need her. No matter how hard she tried, she could keep her mind off of that kiss that they had shared in the Kill it and Grill it... It took days to forget the way that he tasted. Did he know just what an effect he had on her? "The team?" she asked him, after he was done ranting about her sleeping around. "The team is bothered that I sleep around? That I kiss a lot of boys and a lot girls?" she asked, an almost mocking tone to her voice. "Or is it you that is bothered by it, Lucas? Because I'll spread my legs to whomever comes around?" There was a determined look on her face; one that seemed as though it could read through everything. "Have you ever stopped to wonder why I never slept with you, Lucas?" she asked, a mirthless laugh escaping her lips. "Because I'm a stupid little girl with a crush." she spat. 'And you mean more to me than just a good time between the sheets. And I want passion, Lucas, but you've made it clear that you and I don't have that between us." She clenched her jaw and moved away from him, unable to look him in the eye after such a confession. But then, something happened that Mila could have never expected. It was... a box. He had said that there was jewelry in it. Everything else was forgotten as she leaned down to pick up the box. Tears started to well up in the corners of her eyes. She held it, almost like she was uncertain on how to. She walked toward him, a single tear moving down her cheek. She handed it back to him, her eyes resting just below his. She swallowed. It was uncertain whether she was swallowing back her nerves, or something that she just didn't want to be feeling. "Give this to me when it can be more meaningful then." she said, pressing it back into his hands, before she almost mechanically, brought her eyes to meet his. There was a sharp intake of breath as she leaned forward, kissing him passionately. Just... Just this once. She needed to know if it was there... If she was lying to herself for saying that there was nothing there, or if she was simply fooling herself into believing that there was something. She needed to know. A hand rested on his jaw, as the other pushed through his hair. She knew that his taste would haunt for quite a long time after this... But she wanted to. Just once. To know... If there was something. Anything. TAGGING, LUCAS THE LOATHED. 836. OUTFIT

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[Lucas Karl North]

Dig after dig after dig. Was she just going to throw everything he said back at him? He supposed he deserved it since it was exactly what he'd done to her but... he wished she didn't have to dismiss literally everything he said as being untrue. He wanted to just snap and unload everything on her since that's the direction she was pushing him but he couldn't. There'd be stuff he knew he'd say that truly couldn't make the situation anything other than worse. Even in this state he knew that making shit worse was probably the worst idea ever.

And then he was ranting at her. He knew he wouldn't have done it if they weren't there now. He'd have just bottled it all up and put it to one side. He'd have let her hate him because it would've been easier. But her comment that she threw at him got under his skin and he threw his hands up. "Yes! Yes I do because if someone who fucking vowed not to do it managed it then I'm pretty fucking sure anyone could." An anger that wasn't even directed at Mila showed on his features then and he turned his head to look off to the side. He didn't mean to say it but that seemed to be a running trend with Lucas. Always saying stuff he wasn't supposed to.

"Fine, it's me! I'm bothered by it and now you know. I hate it and I hate to think you're even okay with doing it because you're fucking better than that." He practically growled the comment, feeling a mixture of anger and relief that she'd actually shoved him to the point where he'd said it. He balled his hand into a fist by his side and attempted to take a deep breath, looking back at her when she started to speak again. Had he ever wondered why? Sure he had and he could've probably guessed at the reason why. It was just different when she actually confessed it and he found that whatever retort he might've given her quickly died in his throat.

Then he practically threw the gift at her and let her make of it what she would. The actual stress levels he was feeling were pushing him to the edge and he knew things were just going to shit. In fact, he knew that the most likely thing that would happen once all of this was over was Mila leaving. Possibly for good this time and no matter what he did Lucas would never get her back. That thought alone was actually crippling.

The moment he saw her crying he knew it was bordering on too late and he bit down on his lip. What's more meaningful than being scared to lose you? Probably the one thing he should've said..he didn't. Instead he looked back at her before she kissed him. He could practically feel the question in it and he tried his best to figure out an answer. Wrapping one arm around her waist, he used his free hand to bury his fingers through her hair and pull her close to deepen the kiss. Lucas matched her passion with something more heated even as he broke it slightly to bite her lip. "I need you." He muttered, almost hating himself for saying it but he knew he had to. He couldn't escape it since it was fact; he needed her back with the team, needed her around him, with him. He needed to know that she wasn't going to leave because... Well, he just couldn't cope with the thought. It would drive him insane.

Notes: he should've said it.
Outfit: so lazy right now
Words: I didn't count :x

[Mila Mika Eppolito]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style,padding-left:16px; padding-top:0px; padding-right:0px; padding-bottom:0px; background-image:url(http://i462.photobucket.com/albums/qq345/originalscenesta/black_.jpg) ] it's gone on too long It's just the way that we're diseased It's the blade that stains us. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Yes! Yes I do because if someone who fucking vowed not to do it managed it then I'm pretty fucking sure anyone could. There it was. What Mila had known, courtesy of digging through his things. The secret that he didn't think that she knew. She swallowed and watched him, keeping a cold and aloof look on her face, as though she was trying to keep her emotions from showing. "What do you mean?" she asked, her eyes narrowed. "What do you mean that someone vowed to never stab you in the back?" she asked, her voice entirely too calm, given the situation. Oh, she knew what this was about. A part of her wanted to rejoice in finally getting him to confide in her, but she knew that this was not the way that she had wanted it to happen. As she had scolded herself for, a thousand times over, she wanted to believe that he was capable of letting her in the way that she had let him in. In her mind, she had imagined them sharing secrets, a few intimate moments... But Lucas was so determined to keep her as far away from arms length as he could that he had pushed her completely out. And now, the secrets were about to come falling from his lips; and it was all because of some stupid, fucking, mistake. If looks could kill, as Mila took a few steps toward him, she was certain that Lucas would have been six feet under. Why had he never admitted to being jealous before? What was he going to lose by admitting that he wanted her, and that he wanted her all for himself? Had he not noticed the scathing looks that she had given to Melody on more than one occasion? How she had all but threatened to slit her throat from ear to ear? "Because I'm better than that?" she asked, watching him carefully. "All I ever wanted for you to do was admit that you wanted me, and that you wanted me for yourself. But it seems as though we're both too fucking broken to get to that point. So let's just forget everything that has ever happened between us. Everything that we've ever said. Every tease that I've thrown your way... Everything." She wanted more than anything to leave him at this moment, but she knew that she was too weak. She needed Lucas, and that was what was killing her. Things happened so fast after that. He had hit the trunk of a tree, she had moved toward him. He threw a box of jewelry at her, that she still had yet to look at... but her heart hurt. She wanted to forget this; forget him. She needed to move on from this before they both destroyed each other. But, somehow, even without his touch, and his taste on her tongue, he was addicting to her. She swallowed and pushed all of those thoughts aside; just for one kiss. He took her breath away. With his hands moving through her hair, and his lips moving against hers, she felt what she had always wanted to feel. She felt safe. Pressing herself entirely against him, she moved her hands over his back, holding him as close as she dared. "I need you, Lucas." she confessed, locking eyes with him. "But..." she closed her eyes, a pained, sorrowful expression coming to her face. For the first time in years, Mila appeared to be human. She kissed him again; a gentler, love filled kiss. She would never admit the truth to him, but she was head over heels in love with him. Had been for a while, and probably always would be. She broke the kiss and stepped away from him, shaking slightly as she wrapped her arms around herself. "I need... I need to go." she said, giving him this... pathetic, almost apologetic smile. She turned on her heel, and kept her head low as she walked back toward the rig. TAGGING, LUCAS THE LOATHED. 672. OUTFIT

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[Lucas Karl North]

"I mean my ex wife." Lucas snapped, suddenly regretting ever opening his mouth almost immediately afterwards. That was just his bloody luck. The one thing he'd managed to keep from everyone he just blurted out in an argument because he couldn't keep his temper in check. "Just..forget it. Forget I said anything at all." He told her, unable to really look at her now that he knew she was aware he'd been married before. Even though she didn't know the entire story behind it the whole thing was just...too much at once. It was his biggest and best kept secret after all.

And what she said next just pissed him off again. He didn't care that she was angry too because what she'd said just..fuck. "That I wanted you to myself?" He asked, a frown creasing his brow dangerously. "You wanted me to admit it, admit to wanting to be possessive over you and wanting to keep you to myself... yet you don't like it if I treat you like a possession. Make up your mind, Mila, because you're sounding like a contradiction."

Then everything happened in a blur and they were kissing rather heatedly. He'd never say it but he knew, deep down, that it was a moment he'd been craving with her. To feel her hands on him, the way she felt pressed close with her lips against his own. But in a more..intimate way than it was back at the Kill it and Grill it. His arm tightened around her waist for a moment when she made her confession but something in him paused when it became apparent that she hadn't finished speaking. He wanted to stop her, to just kiss her again and prevent her from saying what he knew she was going to. That's why he lingered when she kissed him again, unwilling for their closeness to come to an end so soon.

Though reluctantly he let her take a step back and looked to the floor, feeling something inside of his break a little more when she said she needed to go. "I don't want you to." He muttered to himself more than anything as she started to walk back to the rig.

Notes: shorter but I didn't know where to go with it. There was epicness at the start but then I had to skip and work with him being D: over her leaving >.< aha sorry~ <3
Outfit: so lazy right now
Words: I didn't count :x